Cynical

It's tempting, in one's youth, to mistake cynicism for wisdom. One fancies oneself so broken and jaded that nothing is taken at face value. Everything is said with underlying innuendos, unmentioned motives. Everybody has something to hide, and truth seldom surfaces unless to cover more lies.

It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy; when one spurns love, or anything remotely resembling genuine affection. You don't recognize love even when it's staring you in the face. You scoff and without even knowing it, turn love away, the very love you refuse to believe in, the very love you crave.