Here I go

I looked through my recent entries and discovered that I've been typing in short disjointed sentences. Not that I don't usually type that like, but recently it has gotten worse. In fact my english standard has deteriotated to a point where I had trouble with the previously mentioned QET.

I could say that my undoubtedly poor performance was due to the fact that I've never taken GP lessons, or that I lack practice in writing proper essays; the last time I wrote a proper essay was for my 'O' levels English paper. But, that would be deceiving both the reader and myself. Global warming and renewable energy sources were the focus of the QET paper and I was supposed to write a convincing argument on whether it was crucial for Singapore to adopt renewable energy sources. We had an article to reference to, and the grammer editing section of the paper was on global warming, so a lack of information was not a problem. The problem was in the organisation and eventual penning down of my thoughts. I had trouble focusing. Ideas swam through my mind incoherently. My attempts at writing an outline failed miserably. In the end I decided to screw everything and just start writing. That was my first mistake. Writing an argumentative essay is unlike a narrative or a blog entry where you can get away with missing out an important point. Also, it is unlike typing a paper on the computer where you can back-space and edit what you've written.

I had problems with my attention span too. I could not keep focused, and I eventually gave up and just wrote in whatever style I felt like writing. I made cynical remarks about our "pragmatic society" that is apathetic to the environmental disasters happening elsewhere in the world because, well, they are not happening here. I wrote that to convince a society that is this pragmatic, one needs other reasons, either political or economical. In fact, I even wrote that it is crucial for Singapore to make a show of developing and using renewable energy sources because it will improve our standing in the international community.

I remember reading "State of Fear" by Michael Crichton and it was about how global warming's a myth. Only problem was that I could not remember the details. For all my bullshit about how I read slowly to really appreciate a book, I display a remarkable lack of retention of the book's content.

I just finished reading Oscar Wilde's "The soul of man under socialism" and I must say that man writes beautifully. He bullshits so damn well that one might even be taken in, and accept his writings as truth. He wrote about Jesus like he really knows the man. He ascribes his own philosophies to Jesus, and maybe even Plato. I know little of the teachings of Plato, but enough about Jesus' teachings to be absolutely sure that they were definately not about Individualism and the perfection of man as claimed by Oscar Wilde. Oscar Wilde even lies blatantly. He claimed that Jesus accepted authority, both that of the Roman government and the Jewish church. It was true that Jesus did not rebel nor teach rebellion against the romans, but he did wreck the jewish synagogue in rage. Basically I totally disagree with his references to Christ, but I do agree with some of his other points. Besides, beauty covers a multitude of sins, and Oscar Wilde certainly writes beautifully. Read "The picture of Dorian Gray" if you haven't. It's sinfully good.

As I walk from place to place, plugged into my ipod, I sometimes have feel the urge to write about stuff. Stuff like beauty and arrogance. On the virtues of virginity and why it makes a hell lot of sense to keep it till marriage; not so much for the man, but for the lady.

-i realise after finishing my brainless tirade that it might be offensive to some .. so if you think you might be offended by an entirely tactless and senseless discussion of virginity, please don't read on-




Now that I've got a writing momentum, let me try to touch on the issue of virginity. Sex, and references to sex are everywhere. In movies, a couple makes love shortly before or after they're pictured to have fallen in love. Not marriage, but "in love". No, actually sometimes they have sex even when there's no love involved. Pick up any gender-focused magazine like Men's Health or Her World and you'll definately find an article or two about sexual techniques. Everywhere we turn, we see or hear references to sex. There is no escape. Is it any wonder then, that people are starting to take their virginity lightly.

Sex is seen, is portrayed as an act of love, or as an act bringing extreme pleasure. I doubt a girl who's a virgin will seek out a random stud for sexual pleasures; that would be stupid. I believe most girls who choose to have sex before marriage will have it with someone they love, and whom hopefully, loves them. Generally speaking, that is silly. Why do I say so? Ok, when a girl loves a guy, she will most likely want to marry him and spend the rest of her life with him. And so she thinks to herself that since they're so in love and would probably be for a lifetime, she feels it is acceptable to give up her virginity to the said guy. Maybe he has been pressurising her for sex and she is worried that if she can't fulfil his sexual desires, he'll look else where. Maybe he has been giving her the over-used but definately effective line that if she loves him, she should, well, let him fuck her.

What will most likely happen is that they quarrel some time in the future, discover irreconcilable differences, and break up. What happens now? The girl has been robbed of her most precious gift that she has for her future husband. She has lost her virginity and has well, nothing much left to lose. From this group of girls, several breeds are born. Some learn not their lesson, and go on making the same mistake over and over again. Some get so jaded they seek out partners purely for sexual pleasures. And of course there are those that get so traumatised that they sink into depression.

In the best case scenario, the couple stays together, and the girl waits for the man to propose. But what incentive does he have to propose? They're already intimate, both emotionally and sexually. Marriage will just be a burden. A waste of money, and a stone around the neck. If sex is reserved for after marriage, the man will have every incentive to marry the girl. No money? He'll work harder. This might even make the man a better person, and eventually, a better husband.

Why have sex before marriage? There is absolutely no convincing argument supporting it. Some might claim that a couple gets more emotionally intimate after sex. I disagree. Emotional intimacy might in fact suffer once a couple starts having sex. They talk less, fuck more. Time that was once spent getting to know each other better is now spent on foreplay and sex. If sexual furstration builds up, masterbate. Either alone, or for each other. Then again, it might not be a good ideal to mutually masterbate because, where does one draw a line? And the couple might get so drawn into the foreplay that a progression to actual intercourse becomes the most natural thing in the world. Emotional intimacy will then suffer as much as if they're having sex. In fact, it might even suffer more, as the poor guy tries every mean known to man to get intercourse.

Total abstinence is then the best. In theory. Practically however, it's almost impossible. Couples hold hands, they hug, and they kiss. This leads to making out, and into foreplay. It's a natural progression. What should we do then? Abstain from dating? Impossible. Our brains are hardwired to obey God's command to seek out members of the opposite sex and eventually to be fruitful and multiply. His later commands to flee from fornication and sexual immorality are more easily ignored.

The above paragraphs are perhaps the most ridiculously hypocritical ones I've ever written. I'm no saint; in fact I'm knocking on the gates of hell. Put a gorgeous babe in front of me and my prayer will not be "lead me away from temptation" but "God forgive me for I will sin". I hope nobody's offended by what I wrote, and please, please don't take it seriously.