Burp

I'm burping curry - or at least my burp smells of curry. Actually do you taste or smell your burp? I know others smell your burp, but maybe you taste it before you actually smell it since it travels pass your tongue before getting to your nose.

The above-mentioned burp was a result of my 4 kosong 1 egg prata supper at the famous RK House at Serangoon Gardens. Do a search on youtube.com for RK house if you have no idea what I'm talking about. "No Pork! No Pork!" should help refresh the memory of my memory challenged readers.

Speaking of challenged, I'm speech challenged, as most of you know. I went for my first speech therapy session last Friday after getting a referral from the Hougang Polyclinic where the doctor remarked "but you don't stutter what" when I asked for a referral for speech therapy.

Anyway, some background information on stuttering according to my speech therapist. Stuttering is innate, determined before you were born(layman's term for genetically determined i guess) and is not related to IQ levels. Basically, we stutters aren't dumb! People generally allude intelligence to eloquence, thus the need to clarify this point. It's true though, speak beautifully enough and you can get away with almost anything.

Next, there is no cure for adult stuttering, so if you notice that your kid is stuttering, for the love of all things remotely holy please send him or her(statistics show it's usually a him) for speech therapy. Stuttering in kids is almost 100% treatable compared to the 0% success rate in adults. Adults can only be taught techniques to control their speech, sacrificing naturalness of speech for fluency. This is achieved by what is known as "Smooth Speech" technique where the adult stutterer is first made to draaaggggg oouuttt hiiisss woooorrrddsss and speak really slowly like so. The speed is gradually increased to a comfortable level while still maintaining fluency. Inflections that give emotions to speech are mostly lost, leading to pretty monotonous speech.

My therapist claims that most people who meets a reformed stutterer for the first time would not even notice that he is using Smooth Speech and is/was a stutterer. Yeah, I replied, they would just think him a remarkably boring person. So, be boring, or stutter my way through life. Pragmatism triumphed over aestheticism, and I've decided to proceed with the treatment.

The cost of the treatment will be $600 after subsidy and my agreeing to partake in their research program. Shaun the lab rat! S-s-shaun the stuttering lab rat at that. Anyhow, I have to make two 10-minute audio recordings with individuals of my choice by my next appointment on Friday, one in English and the other in Mandarin. I have no idea how I am going to sustain a ten minute conversation in Mandarin, stutter or no stutter. I barely passed my chinese oral examinations man. Any takers? It's a shot at fame you know =)

My therapist also asked if any of my friends made fun of my stuttering. I remember a few occasions, but I can only remember one name - Janet, who has been innocently(i hope) teasing me every now and then since I was 14. No hard feelings babe, at least nothing a steak and a beer can't soften.

I was asked whether I would be in a different course of study if not for my stuttering. Yes, I said, I would have taken mass communications. Therapist laughed and said yes, many of her patients are IT students.

Oh and here's my supper buddy for tonight, Jeryd the bird Soh, who happily called me the devil while making little horned gestures with his hands. Weeli for good, politically correct advice, and Shaun for biting, realistic ones. He wants to get tattoos of an angel and a devil on his left and right shoulder blades. I suggested that he label the angel Weeli and the devil Shaun.


Ok, to bed! Tomorrow I code, climb, watch pirates, code, try to send strings of data from PC to Phone and get a day older.